AFV

last night I got on youtube before bed and found some montages from america's funniest home videos.  I laughed so hard I cried and had to force myself to breathe. nothing better than kids and animals doing the stuff they do best!

I am

totally, completely  heartbreakingly homesick right at this minute. very lonely. very sad. its just hit me all of a sudden, theres no reason except maybe it was building.  but I'm very sad right now.  and I'm actually crying, and I never cry.  I miss having friends. I miss having someone be happy to see me instead of coming home from work with a scowl and barking at me until I yell at him to knock it the hell off.
 I miss seeing flowers once in a damn while. trees, hell, bushes would do. something besides dirt and weird landscaped grass thats squishy and collects water and saves it for days so that you sink in and get wet a week after it rained.
    just because there are a few people around doesnt mean the word "isolated" doesnt apply. I can see the walls. they are really effing ugly.

the root that trips you in the middle of the path

 Not only have I not blogged recently, but some people are wondering how I am...I am pretty good. these are the things going through my head recently.

 I'll be glad when august comes and we are out of california, because although I have friends here, my childless ones either work or go to school, and the ones with kids have gone back home for their husbands various deployments and things. so its been a few months since I spent time with a female friend. I didnt realize that till the other day, and I suddenly feel that its not ok to never be around your girlfriends. I have no encouragement, I dont get to chat about things that a girl would want to...it just gets a bit old to always have to fight the boys off the video games, sit through a sick horror flick to earn my turn at picking a movie...I miss girl time.

 A new neighbor moved in kitty-corner behind my house, and has seen the kids playing on the back deck and banging on the sliding glass door at each other...whoever this person is, they are concerned that I am locking my kids out  or something like that, so they called child protective services. they'll be looking in on us for the next month.

I've finally stopped waiting around for the hubby to be ready for bed, and started going to bed early by myself. man is it ever nice to get more sleep!

Matthew is learning more table manners, talking more and more every day, and responding pretty well to time outs. :) Ava has suddenly developed a two year old little girl attitude....so I'm having to do more time outs with her too. not sure if they are working, she hangs on to her attitude a WHOLE lot longer than Matthew does even after shes sat all by herself for several minutes. So, on my to-do list, find the method of discipline that will work on an extra stubborn child.